{Day 24}

my diploma

Well. It's over.

It still hasn't sunk in yet. I mean, it doesn't feel real.

Yet at the same time, I'm getting so excited to see my family again. A mental countdown has started in my head without my knowing it - less than 24 hours and I'll be back home!

Back home. Where this culture isn't "normal." Where I'm the carrier instead of the one being infected.

Oh, what an intimidating responsibility. Lord, help me.

But the day. Oh yes, the day.

myself, Yasmin, and Anja

It started out with a bundle of nerves because this morning was the morning we presented our gift to Kathy. 'Gift' meaning 'gifts.' Along with all the insanity of worship school this past week, five other ladies and myself have been organizing this presentation for Kathy. It started out with a Facebook post by me saying something to the effect of, "Let's do something for Kathy! What should we do?"

The result was an expedition in leadership, delegation, and promotion. Epic. We collected money for flowers {not my committee}, wrote a song {also not my committee}, and compiled a binder full of thank-you notes and art {my committee}. It was a journey of Facebook, standing in front of workshops, of Dan McCollum promoting our cause, shushing whenever Kathy walked by, and more Facebook {we have a lively Facebook group containing 250 of the 450 students}. And then, to top it all off, we got Brian Johnson and the tech team involved. The tech team to shoot the words to the song up on screen as we all {all} sang them, and Brian to play the song. {They had changed the lyrics to "Mighty to Save."}

Nicole and I

Wow. Typing all that makes me even more surprised that we did it. But we did. Brian introduced us, we presented the flowers and the binder, Kathy cried, and then Brian accompanied Anja leading the song. {Lyrics.} And Kathy cried...a lot...more. :)

I don't yet have any video to embed here. But - guess what! iBethel got it all! Like, for reals! So if you're an iBethel subscriber, you should totally go watch it! {Or listen, depending on your subscription.} I sound super nervous and not at all how I imagine myself sounding, but my parents recognized me long distance without even knowing about our epic plan, so, I guess I sound more like Lucy Cunningham Schulz {Adventures in Odyssey} than I thought. Note to self: must get into radio drama soon.

{The first person you hear talking on the iBethel recording is Beni Johnson! It was so funny - Brian introduced her as 'my mom,' so I'm totally thinking, "Wow, this is cool, Brian's mom." It took me a good ten or twenty seconds to figure out who Brian Johnson's mom was. *rolls eyes* And then, guess who sneaked in! Bill Johnson! He stood in the back and listened to our main session. I'm so so so so so honored he broke his sabbatical to be with us this morning. I know what a big deal sabbaticals are, and I know how well deserved his was. So for him to come was a huge honor, for me at least.}

some worship art this morning

Anyway, worship was spontaneous-style, which basically means we stayed more or less on one song for a good hour, hour and a half. It was awesome. Our last song was "You Have Won Me," a new Bethel song, one I haven't been able to connect with until today. It's an anthem, but I feel like it was for us and was our commission. And then Brian and Jenn hung out and prophesied over some of us. Then more worship. Then finally the 'teaching.'

Jenn Johnson & I
super blurry, but i have a better pic coming

Jenn had a quick exhortation on not being arrogant or frustrated, and how God will help us bring back what we've learned. And then she and Brian just shared stories, stories of the supernatural that they've experienced, just to encourage us. Stories are the best. Then we got to hear the story of how they met and got married. Let's just say: you thought Kris & Kathy's "Engaged at 12, married at 18" story was crazy? Here's another. It's a lot longer {and much funnier} than this, but Brian and Jenn dated for 10 days before they were engaged. They were engaged for 7 months and were married 5 days after she turned 18.

Erinn & I

Can you tell I don't want to go to sleep? This has to be the longest blog post ever. Because once I go to sleep, I have to wake up in a new day, a day not like all the other days here, my first day without worship. A day of home, thank you, Jesus, but a day without this culture for the first time in weeks.

Ate lunch. We did 30 minutes of Creative Expressions so we got to finish everyone.
{The following song is sung in Creole by a girl from Haiti. The song is a declaration of life, of a will to live in God. It was written by her friend who died in the earthquake.}

Remember the spoken word guy I mentioned last week? Well, they brought him back. I know, that's kind of a big deal! There's a video floating around Facebook at this link, but I didn't take one myself. Go listen. It will give you chills.

Then it was fire tunnel time!! A fire tunnel just for us BSW students, comprised of Bethel staff and worship team. Fun, fun, fun.


Home. Ate. Walked up the entire hill to go to pre-service prayer. No one picked us up. I wasn't too surprised, since I've walked the hill at least four times without anyone picking me up, but this was the first time my roomates had had to do it. {Apparently one of my roomates had told God she would walk the hill once before she left. Haha.} What weirded me out this time is that I wasn't sore. The other times I've walked it, the top kills my calves. But today I was fine. Sweaty, but not hurt. Weird.

Pre-service prayer was sweet and good. Worship was led by Matt and Hayley. Ken Williams, who is in charge of Global Legacy, gave the message. A very good message about "Vulnerability & Being Known". Highlights:

• "Mold grows in the dark." - Ken Williams
• "The most vulnerable person is the most powerful person in the room." - Mark Peterson
• "The world system is trying to separate us from each other." - Ken Williams
• "God's definition of an accountability partner equals friend." - Ken Williams
• God cannot remove desires because He satisfies desires.
• "Cowardliness is not a virtue." - Ken Williams
• The original definition of courage was "to tell the story of who you are with your whole heart."

Came home, and then went on an adventure with Lauren, Mitch, Laurel, Amber, and Dani to Sundial Bridge. Apparently people travel to see it. It's pretty cool, yes, a great hang out spot. It's been a while since I've goofed off with people just out to have fun, and let me tell you, BSSM students/grads know how to have fun.

Came home. Ate chips. Packed a little. And now I'm here. Writing a blog post. In total denial that tomorrow I shall leave this wonderful place.

And now I post this blog at 3:22AM. My alarm will be ringing in a little more than 3 hours. I haven't pulled something like this off in a long while. And what with jet lag and all...

Dear God, I need double sleep tonight.

{Day 17}

Started out with a slew of announcements that included this lovely video for the new Bethel dating website, OnDaySix.com. After telling us that we should ask someone out today. :) {Don't worry, Mom & Dad, no one did.}


Guess what today is. You'll never guess. Canada Day! I have two Canadian friends here, so I was happy for them. They were all stoked, and Kathy let them all come up to the front and sing their anthem:


Then worship, led by Brian Johnson with backup singer Leah, his sister. It was more of an acoustic set, because Brian's voice has been undergoing some stress. But then, about halfway through the {long} set after some prophetic worship, he put his guitar down, stepped away from the mic, came down to the floor {where we were}, and gave his wireless mic to William and another to Steffany. And then they led prophetic worship {put extremely simply: prophetic worship is spontaneous choruses not previously written and that worship or encourage} from the floor. Then they handed the mic to other people - some of us students. And we were just having a blast. It was fun. Fun worship. Prophetic song after prophetic song, with Brian and William and Steffany just going at it. We had a blast. This video is of the very end, after the singing stopped, unfortunately. The first person the camera pauses on is Steffany Frizzell, then William and Brian sitting on the stage steps. I'm sorry it's so short, and that it's not actually of the song. I was finally ready to film...and we were done.

Steffany & William

Then William and Steffany did the teaching, one after the other. Highlights:

• William Matthews
• Tell of who God is, don't cater to what the congregation is feeling.
• Steffany Frizzell
• Highest praise comes from the deepest place.
• "Worship was never for us." {It's for God, not to make us feeling better.} - Steffany Frizzell
• Worship means laying yourself down.
• Worship is to Him, and for Him, and because of Him.
• Mary "went and looked for a testimony {Elizabeth} because she could not see her own promise." - Steffany Frizzell
• "Don't ask God for a baby if you're not ready to carry one." - Steffany Frizzell
• "Go surround yourself with testimony." - Steffany Frizzell

Then they played a couple of tracks from William's upcoming CD. And this happened:


Lunch, and then Jenn Johnson's talk on prophetic worship. A lot of practical advice that I won't write here, but if that's something your interested in, ask me about it. Anyway, Jenn is awesome and so real. So real. Just incredibly vulnerable and unashamed and real.

"Do not feel something in your heart that you're not willing to talk about."

Then Carol, Anja, Amber, Dani, and I, decided to go to the mall. While we were waiting for Anja to get out of her voice lesson with Joanna, we met a BSSM1 grad named Thais. Thais is from Brazil and awesome. She was also going to the mall, so I rode with her and found out more about her. She's married to a fellow Brazilian, and they both moved up here to go to BSSM. I love her, and I really hope to know her better. She speaks fluent Portuguese.

We went to the mall. We ate. We went to Ross. I got a duffel bag thing that I may or may not keep...for all the extra stuff I'm going to be bringing home. Then we went to church for the evening service. Worship was great, though I'm not sure who led. Steve and Wendy Backlund taught. I have a lot of highlights:

• "You are not the problem." - Wendy Backlund
• "Current beliefs create future experiences." - Steve Backlund
• "The more truth you believe is the more hope you'll have." - Steve Backlund
• "We can't be so addicted to reality." - Wendy Backlund
• "I am well able to overcome it." - Steve Backlund
• "The Kingdom of God is not moved forward by good conduct, it's moved forward by good beliefs." - Steve Backlund
• "You don't fall from grace by sinning. You fall from grace by trying to work." - Wendy Backlund
• "You can't do what you don't think you are." Wendy Backlund
• "You're one belief away from a tipping point in your life." - Steve Backlund
• "The only time your past can determine your future is if you live in it." - Wendy Backlund
• You know what you really believe when you listen to yourself when you're not being religious.
• "The God that is within me, and He will cause me to succeed." - Wendy Backlund
• "You're only able to receive what you think you're worth." - Wendy Backlund
• Are you living in abundance compared to His riches and glory?
• God often has to answer prayers in opposition to our beliefs.
• Hope and faith have to be attached to a belief.
• "How we make decisions, in the long run, is more important than the decisions we make." - Steve Backlund
• "Leaders are not thermometers, they are thermostats." - Steve Backlund
• "If you're an encourager, people are gonna hear you more." - Steve Backlund
• "There are no ideal circumstances to renew your mind." - Steve Backlund
• "You're being prepared for greater influence." - Steve Backlund

Now I'm home, full, and exhausted. Good night!

{Day 1}

the trek

that's Bethel, on the hill

Where do I begin?

This morning we woke up (after dealing with 2 hours of jet lag and the fact that the sun rises at 5:30AM here) and began our 15 minute trek to Bethel Church. Dry, dry weather here.

We stood in line for a long time, and I registered. I'm official! So happy!

i'm official!

the line

my binder: even more official

More waiting inside the sanctuary, and then, finally, it was time for worship. Jeremy Riddle and Steffany Frizzell led. ("Furious," "For Your Glory," "I Will Exalt") It was delicious. I went to the back and danceddanceddanced. So wonderful, although I realized that my dancing stamina is a CCC stamina...not a Bethel stamina (longer worship). So we're gonna work on that.

my entry

And then a guy started singing, and it wasn't Jeremy. I looked around and finally realized that it was Brian, somewhere offstage. He and Steffany began this back-and-forth, back-and-forth. About opening up heaven and calling down freedom and Jacob's ladder and angels. It's worth mentioning Jeremy's reaction to Brian's interruption of the worship: worship. Worship was his reaction. He stepped away from the mic and just enjoyedenjoyedenjoyed. That was cool to watch, though my mind was on other things.

Things like the grand something that the music did. Things like the three guys - not BSW students, and I'm pretty sure they're with Bethel - jumping up onto the stage dancing. Any other place, it would have been weird. But it was so...right.

And the room exploded. I had already been dancing, but now it was just like it just turned on. Dancing without caring, just like dancing. I don't really know how to explain this explosion. Jeremy Riddle started dancing. Everyone was dancing. It was just free. I can't explain it any better than that. It was awesome.

Then Brian Johnson spoke. His topic was on fame and waiting for God to promote you.

• "Worship isn't a song that's sung. It's a heart that sings." - Brian Johnson

We had lunch. We did announcements and were introduced to all the instructors. And then Dan McCollam spoke on not being intimidated by the other talent in the room...and also about being yourself and not trying to be someone else. Tears. So good. Highlights:

• A song does not gets value by how many people like it. A song gets its value by God's influence in your life through it. - Dan McCollam
• "You not only have an original song, you are an original song." - Dan McCollam
• When you use someone else's sound, something {your sound} is missing in heaven. - Dan McCollam
• "Stop cultural genocide. Be yourself." - Dan McCollam
• Supernatural worship is
• a priority on the presence of God
• creating a heaven atmosphere
• as relevant to heaven as you are on earth
• "Give me the music of a generation, and I will change the mind of a generation." - Plato
• And, to top it all off, brain studies show that the mind is 8 times more activated by music than a sermon.

on the way home; see mountain with snow

me and my Alabama and France roomies

 And now I'm home, or, my home for these few weeks. I've finally met all my roommates. One is from France, one is from Alabama, and one is from Dallas. The ones from France and Alabama and I have taken to hanging out, and I enjoy their company.

my house! it's purple!

in the backyard

the exquisite back porch

also in the backyard; i think this is what smells so good

What Does It Sound Like

"This song live is beyond description." - Raymond

Worship 7/2

FROM YESTERDAY (7/2)

Chris Quilala
"Sound check....very moving...WOW" - Raymond

 

"They are playing 'Burning Ones'" - Raymond

Brian Johnson

Chris Quilala
"Wow" - Raymond

"

"This girl played violin after school. The music quieted everyone. It was a cool moment." - Raymond

Days 5/6

[as told to Melody]

Yesterday, Raymond went to the healing rooms at Bethel. He was assigned a group letter (A-Z) and sent to wait in the Encounter room, where a beatnik band (two djembes, a guitar, a female singer, and a keyboardist) did worship. There was no set direction there. People danced, people prayed, people waited on the Holy Spirit.

There were a couple of people (scheduled) walking around the room praying for people. One of these was a very animated lady that unnerved Raymond just a little. Finally, she came to him and asked, very politely, if she could put her hand on his shoulder. She was honoring him by asking, and he was very aware of it. He said yes, and she prayed for him calmly. I can't remember what she said or prayed, or what - if anything - happened after that. Ask Raymond.

After one and a half to two hours, Raymond was summoned to one of the healing rooms. A man there, about ten years older than Raymond, prayed for the physical ailments that Raymond had listed. There were no "physical manifestations of healing" yesterday, but the man and Raymond talked at length. In prayer, the man just waited and listened to the Holy Spirit. Finally, he said, "God wants you to know...that progress is being made."

Raymond and this man really hit it off, and Raymond is planning on going to the man's heart/life/home/church group Tuesday night. I'm not sure if only the healing rooms took 3-4 hours (making it 5-6 hours total) or if that was the total. Either way, it was a long time.

Today was church. Dad and some of the other roomates were going to walk, but Jeff woke up and let them take the car last minute. He took the truck to where he leads worship at another church. Brian Johnson led worship. Nothing incredible or out of the ordinary to report. Good day.