{Day 19}

Got up early and went to church. Brian Johnson led and Kris Vallotton spoke! Happy day! Highlights:

• Past prophetic words could very well be for what you're struggling with right now.
• You're going to eat the fruit of what you say.
• Three keys for Joshua's victory:
• the law of God was to be in his mouth
• he was to meditate {think, remember, sing, speak} on it day and night
• he would do all he was thinking
• "You cannot be tempted by something you don't have an appetite for." - Kris Vallotton
• "I am not defined by my appetites. I am defined by the choices I make concerned my appetite." - Kris Vallotton
• Your heart gives your mind parameters for how it can think.
• Your heart has a PR person - your tongue.
• Fear and anxiety are why we don't manage our thoughts.

It was a great teaching. As always, of course, but still just wonderful. :) If you have iBethel, go listen. :)

The rest of the day was spent with some food, some phone calling, some picture uploading to Facebook {nothing you haven't seen here, but at least it's all in one place}, some watching of Jenna paint a picture, and then off to church again! Getting there early so we didn't have to sit on the bleachers again.

And then we went to pre-service prayer. We had gone at TwinView during the Kingdom Culture conference and enjoyed it, gotten some prayer and prophecies. But pre-service prayer at Bethel is very different. Basically, everybody chills in the "Great Room" until about fifteen minutes before service. And then we circle and have what's basically a round-the-room fire tunnel. We pray for each other, and then the leaders go around and pray for us. Got prayed for by Danny Silk! But anyway, the pre-service prayer is where it's at. So much crazier than their fire tunnels. Pre-service prayer is where people laugh so hard they fall over. Or just fall over.

Worship was really, really good and long and spontaneous and prophetic - led by William Matthews. If you're an iBethel addict, look that one up, too. {You may actually see me in that one. Felt like the camera was staring at me a lot.} We went into some fun dancing and spontaneous worship, really cool, really fun.

Then a teaching by Eric Johnson. Also really good, though I was starting to get tired. Highlights:

• There's a season for this and a season for that, just know what season you're supposed to be in.
• The wineskin that you're building should be built in such a way that will contain future wine as well.
• Be careful you don't keep the same wineskin for new wine.
• Jesus is okay with giving you something you're not ready for.
• "The Holy Spirit is not a vending machine." - Eric Johnson
• When Jesus left his {three-year} ministry, it exploded. But when a lot of nation-going organizations found ministries, the ministries collapse when they leave.
• If you read the gospels with a mindset that salvation is only there to get us to heaven, you get a list of right and wrongs.
• There's a higher standard with grace than with the law.
• If you're insecure, you don't like to empower people. And if you do empower them, you definitely don't let them higher.
• When you stand in extreme security, you see God on other people.

Then a fire-tunnel. Yay! Danny Silk, and Sheri Silk, and Kathy Vallotton. Laughter. :)

And then a trip to In-N-Out. I was on a quest not to eat out this week, and I still am, but I was also on another quest to eat at In-N-Out before I left. So, that's accomplished. Their fries really are amazing. Cut and fried there, with 0 trans fats, if that makes anybody feel better. Definitely better than McDonalds {though Dani dislikes In-N-Out; she prefers McDonalds French fries. And there is no dissuading her.} Anyway, I'm so ready for a salad tomorrow.

And Snickerdoodle cookies. I so feel like Snickerdoodle cookies, and I have the ingredients to make them! Happy day!

{Day 12}

Today was the second day my whole time here that the alarm clock was actually awake before me. And, truth be told, I didn't actually wake up. I ate breakfast, took a shower, went to church. Jeremy Riddle &; Melissa Wise-How led, and Eric & Candace Johnson spoke. Highlights:

• The higher that we build, the more important it is what we build on.
• The reason you're free is so that you can love someone beyond what the law allows.

Walked home and went back to bed for three more hours.

And still felt tired when I woke up.

worship

Made some good phone calls, chilled in the hammock. And then it was time for evening church. Chris Quilala and Jenn Johnson led.

Then it was time for the teaching. Kris Vallotton. {Someone at my house was saying how they saw a t-shirt that said, "'That's a good word right there.'" - KV" ... If you ever see one of those shirts - I want one.} Highlights:

• Your weapon is between your teeth. {The weapon being your tongue and its ability to make prophetic declarations.}
• Molehills often become mountains by your words, when your words should be making molehills of mountains.
• "When you believe something that isn't true, it becomes true in your life." - Kris Vallotton
• When you're supposed to be telling mountains to move and you tell yourself that you're stupid... {you finish that thought}
• {When you hear encouragement or prophetic declarations over your life and dismiss them because they don't feel true}, they don't feel true because you're believing a lie.
• "I'm always in a valley because I keep talking to my molehills and they become mountains." - Kris Vallotton {giving an example}
• "Grumbling is socially acceptable in the church, but it won't get you into the promised land." - Kris Vallotton
• Consider it joy when you're in a trial so that you don't perpetuate the trial.
• A lot of people are raised from the dead {saved} and then build a house in the graveyard.
• "How do you become a perfect man? By not stumbling what you say." - Kris Vallotton
• Your tongue determines the direction of your destination.
• Once I open my mouth to curse, what was earthly and natural becomes demonic.
• "Complaining in the Kingdom doesn't bring you candy."
• "When you complain, you draw demonic activity into your life."
• When you complain, you're actually saying, 'I don't believe God.'
• "God isn't the light at the end of the tunnel. He's the light in the tunnel." - Kris Vallotton
• We can't exaggerate God's love for us.

I felt so energized after the evening church service. I'm a bit tired now, and I'm about to go to bed, because bed is good, but I'm a far cry from who I was this afternoon. Just needed a second dose of Bethel to get me jazzed. Much more tomorrow! :)

{Day 10}

I have so much stuff from today. Morning worship was led by William Matthews. It was good.

Morning session of the Kingdom Culture conference was with Kris Vallotton. It's kinda crazy how happy I was to see him in real life. He has a humility that doesn't come through his audio; he's not that cocky in real life. Highlights:

• "You can't love someone more than they love you." - Kris Vallotton
• You are not a sinner saved by grace. You were a sinner, but when you were saved by grace you became a saint.
• If you believe you're a sinner, you'll sin by faith.
• woah, selah
• "You are seated in heavenly places with Christ and told to call God, 'Daddy.'" - Kris Vallotton
• You are actually born to be amazing.
• "I'm the painting, Jesus is the model, and God is the artist." - Kris Vallotton
• You'll always reduce the environment around you to what you believe is within you.
• You teach people how to treat you by how you treat you.
• "Conviction says, 'You're way too awesome to be acting like that.'" - Kris Vallotton
• "I'm not going to sing about me being a loser when God made me to be a winner." - Kris Vallotton
• If you asked for it, He wants to give You more.
• He's the King of kings. "You are some of the kings He's king over." - Kris Vallotton

Whoa. I know, right?

Kathy's parking space

my contribution to Kathy's spot

During lunch, I ate with a girl named Lisa and Jessica. And then someone had brought sidewalk chalk and gotten permission to decorate the parking spaces of Marlene (the Kathy Vallotton of TwinView), Kathy Vallotton, Paul Manwaring, and the 'guest speaker.'

It was our best and only way to say thank you.

Paul Manwaring's spot

After the lovely chalk art, we went and worshiped some more {not with William}. Then it was Kathy Vallotton's turn to speak. She's not a one-liner sort of person, just stories and phrasing that resonates in your heart 'til you want whatever it is. Highlights:

• "Don't ever let someone else put something on you that isn't you." - Kathy Vallotton
• "You never know what is inside you until the opportunity arises for it to come out." - Kathy Vallotton
• Beautiful = Be You 'til You're Full

Fat Boyz

my Fat Boyz salad

me, Anja, Dani, & Amber

Supper with Dani, Amber, and Anja at Fat Boyz. {Which has an ironically good salad bar.} We had a lovely long God-conversation that hit on a variety of topics. Then back to TwinView for pre-service prayer.

I'm serious. If you ever go to Bethel, go to pre-service prayer. It's like the best thing ever invented. I spent a good twenty, twenty-five minutes sitting in a chair and then lying on the floor. It was a really monumental time for me, but I'm not going to write what happened. Here's a {slightly edited} journal excerpt:

     "I don't know what this death defying adventure call that draws me is. But I want it. I don't know what exactly it is that I want, and I don't know how to get it. But I know I want it. God, I want Your plan."
     He said, "Are you sure? You don't have to. I can set you up somewhere cozy and comfortable, and you'd be happy."
     I said, "No. I want Your best plan for my life. The best one. Because I trust You. I trust Your plans. I know they are good, and I want them. I don't want to settle for a mediocre plan if You have something better. I'm willing to go through the trials and the process. I know - I know - You have a great destiny for me. And I want it, because it's what I was made for, and I can't get away from my desire of it. I want Your best plan, God!"
     It was giving my life to the Lord. But what I was giving up was nothing compared to what I was receiving. In fact, the reward was greater than the sacrifice. God's best plan. For the first time in my life, I really trust Him. I know that His plans are good, that they're designed for me. He's not going to ask me to do something that I wasn't designed to do.

God will give you what you want
Not because you want it
Though that is reason enough for Him
But because He gave you the want in the first place
When it all began

Right after all that, I got a prophecy about my writing. It's still the craziest feeling in the world when someone comes up to you and goes, "I see you writing." Haha. "Do you write?" And it's like, "YES!" Double confirmation that I'm supposed to do writing with my life. :) {There was more to that prophecy. I wrote it down. It was mainly just a very happy moment of realizing that God actually wants us to do what we like to do {because He designed us to do it}. For some people, that would be a duh! moment, but it was really cool for me.}

Then we had more worship, this also led by William Matthews and Hunter.

Had some good Jesus-time there, too. I won't give you the whole conversation, but here was something really good:

I asked Him if it hurt, when the nails stabbed His skin
I felt a glimpse of wracking pain, made me grimace from within

Then with a smile He took it back, the memory His own

"Oh, it hurt, but there is so much more to know:

"Torture worse than nails, and pain beyond belief,

"A future never knowing you, it would have always been to Me."

worship

Of course, we were dialoguing, not talking in poetry, but it was a revelation well-deserving of poetry.

Then Eric Johnson spoke. Highlights:

• A perfect man {Jesus} says to an imperfect generation, "You will do greater things than I have done."
• Never use power and authority as an indication of a relationship with Jesus. {re: "Depart from me, I never knew you."}
• "We are God's ultimate temple." - Eric Johnson
• There's no place in scripture that gives us permission to turn off His abundance.
• "Desperation is highly overrated." - Eric Johnson
• Desperation is based on a focus of lack. Hunger is based on a focus of abundance.

 Then we came home, laughed with Jenna about fish tanks - apparently I'm funny - and now I'm typing up this blog post. Or, rather, finished typing up the blog post. Tomorrow: healing rooms and a treasure hunt and possibly ultimate frisbee*.


* Ultimate frisbee is not a code word from some super-spiritual church event. It's just straight-up** ultimate frisbee.

** Or it could turn into revival. You never know in Redding with Bethel people. :)

{Day 9} I Adore You Because

I forgot to mention yesterday about the exercise we did after Danny Silk's talk. Half the room lined up against the wall all over the room, and then the other half {mine} was told to get up and find someone we hadn't talked to. And not to talk to them. {Although Chloe and I kinda disobeyed that one...we introduced ourselves because we just couldn't help it. We were strong very a long time, though, because we were both melancholies.}

Anyway, we were each given 30 seconds to ask God what He adored about that person and get three one-word answers. And then we were to look straight at the other person and say, "I adore you because x, y, and z."

It was really cool. There has been so much stuff I've learned while I'm here that I'm like, "Oh, this works in real life!" Because this gives me two things:

1. How to treat someone when I meet them - or even see them across the room. Ask God what He thinks, and translate that to my own belief about that person.
2. How to treat people I don't necessarily like. Ask God what He likes about that person and act accordingly.

That's all. I'm off to a day of Kris Vallotton {!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!}, Kathy Vallotton {!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!}, and Eric Johnson. Wait, he deserves some exclamation points too. {!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!} It's going to be a good day, and I'm excited. :)

{Day 5} Sunday Evening Church

After church yesterday morning, I chilled at home and went shopping at Wal-Mart. Then we went to church (again). Sunday night is their 'revival service,' and it's by far my favorite. Worship was with Brian & Jenn Johnson...we sang a couple of new Bethel songs that I hope to bring back. Hopefully I'll get the chance to hear them again - there's a really good one about the cross.

Eric Johnson (Bill Johnson's son) spoke on Numbers 13-14, when the spies go to Canaan and return with the fruit of the land and a report.

Fruit = testimony/great things God has done in our lives

Report = reality (realize it wasn't a bad report until a few verses down)

Highlights:

• Many times in life you get both (fruit & report) at the same time. The reason why you get both is to see which gets your affection.
• The fruit is an invitation to own the land it came from.
• The fruit is evidence that there's more.
• If you own the land, you can pick the fruit anytime you want. It's in your backyard. If you own it, you can give it away.
• "Faith is not ignorant of reality - it defies it." - Eric Johnson
• "Do you think God uses fear to communicate with you?" - Kris Vallotton (answer: no)
• "A leader can take you where you think you can go. A good leader will take you where you don't think you can go." - Eric Johnson.

It was the best teaching all weekend. Eric really has his dad's gift of one-liners. (Not sure what that's called in Christianese.) You know, when they say something and just pause...and you're like whoa. You know, like that.

Aftewards, two of my roomies and I went with Lauren (host) and her boyfriend to Red Robin and hung out there for a long time. Then we came home and hung out with Laurel (host) some more. I was just going to bed when one of my roomies asked us to hear her song. So, um, yeah, it was a late night. But it was good.

And now I'm off to a day of Kim Walker and rollerskating! :)